Oct 11, 2002

We Interrupt This Program for an Important Announcement!

We interrupt this program to bring you an important announcement... On Wednesday, October 9, 2002, at approximately 7:30 P.M., I asked my girlfriend, Jun, to marry me. And she said yes! I'm still in a state of shock, let me tell you. It has only been a little over three months since we first met each other, and I know a lot of people are saying, "Three months? You hardly even know her!" But we both feel that this is the right decision to make. Both of us are old enough to know what we want in life (I am 36 and Jun is 33), and neither of us want to wait a couple of years before taking this step. And, most importantly, we love each other very much and really do feel incredibly comfortable and compatible with each other. We have not set a date yet, other than to say that it will be sometime next year, and in spite of the speed of our engagement we don't want to rush into marriage. At the very least, there are gobs of plans to be made, not to mention the logistics of getting all the family members together in the same place.

I'm not going to describe our entire courtship, but let me just mention a few tidbits:

  • As I mentioned in my previous entry, Jun and I have either seen each other in person or talked on the phone pretty much every day for the last two months. When we talk, it is often for an hour or more, and when we get together it is often for the entire day. I suspect we have spent more time together in the last two months than most couples do in six months.

  • Two days before I proposed, Jun told me that she talked to her father and that, based on what her mother had told him when she returned to China, he likes and accepts me. This was apparently for three important reasons: I don't smoke, I don't drink, and I don't go to church (and no, the irony of that last reason doesn't escape me)....

  • After I proposed, Jun told me that, while it wasn't "love at first site" on her part, she quickly grew to love me. She said that the defining moment when she knew she wanted to marry me came when I took her to meet my mother for the first time and she saw how well I treated my mother. Jun felt that this was the best indication possible of how I would treat her.

What can I say? All my life it seemed that whenever I met a woman I liked, she had no interest in me, and the women who did express an interest in me were all women I just didn't find attractive (and no, I'm not just talking physical attraction). For years I've worried that I was being too picky, or that maybe I had a subconscious fear of commitment that caused me to avoid women who might actually be interested in me. It seems, however, that it really was just a matter of finding the right woman. Jun is not perfect, any more than I am. But I truly think that she is perfect for me. And, wonders of wonders, she actually seems to feel the same way about me.